DRUGGED CRIPPLED MIDGET IN THE SHOPPING CART
by Bob Eager
I must tell a story about helping someone else in need. To often we forget about the downtrodden ,I am a man of true humanitarianism.
I was walking down the street and I heard this voice say “help me ,help me”. I looked around and didn’t see anyone. I heard the voice again looked across the street and saw a dwarf siting on a sidewalk. This little person was on drugs. He said, “See that shopping cart over there.” I nodded. “Can you grab and bring it over to me. “I grabbed the shopping cart, pushed it over and he slid into the cart. We made our way to the store. I noticed about half way to the store the wheels started rattling. Obviously, this is a shopping cart at the store most people obviously would avoid.
The cart hit a bump. It was then that the Crippled little person fell out of the shopping cart. He hit his head and screamed OWWW.
I said, “Sorry sir are you okay.” He said ‘yeah’ and laughed and slid back into the cart. As we continued to the store, I became increasingly nervous because the wheels were still shaking. We arrived at the Circle K; He jumped out and landed on his head ,’OWWW,’ he said again and then began to cry.
I ran as away as fast as I could; I had enough of helping this person. Across the street, I saw how hurt this person was so I called the paramedics. “Excuse me operator there’s a drugged crippled midget that just felt out of a shopping cart. Can you send an ambulance to Twelfth Street and Indian School.”
The operator said, “Sir this isn’t very funny we don’t take kindly to prank calls.”
It was then that I heard dial tone. I thought no one would come, but sure enough, I saw the paramedics pull up to the store. I smiled and went to the bar knowing that I did my good deed for the day.