Sink or swim (an ode to loneliness)
by Maria Gornell
I often longed to transform
Loneliness into
The inner contentment
Of solitude.
In writing I found the answer
Long into night
My pen wept blood
Sweat and tears
Inscribing my life
Across the blankness of white
forlorn pages
As I come to realisation
I am comfortable
In this freedom of existence
I again ponder on
The perils of alone.
Loneliness could be that single
Glass of wine,
Smoke rings in air
As you greedily
Inhale that joint.
The coldness of sheets at night
2 pillows on a double bed
Tossing and turning
Till birds chirp
Waking as empty
As the next.
A solitary walk through woods
Watching couples embrace
In the suns blistering heat
That feeling that seasons
Are indifferent to our mood
As life happens regardless of us.
It’s the sad realisation
That the one you loved
Was not able to commit.
That the last train home
Fills with drunks and
The only offers you get
Are from obnoxious perverts
Desperate for a shag.
That by the time you
Find self love your
In your late 30’s
And too fussy to settle.
That when it appears the right one comes
He’s half way across another world
And your too afraid to
Say ’lets risk it’
Sink
Swim
Or die
Never having tried.